Ben Roethlisberger: Kidnapping and replacement by android not to blame for his bad year.

Ben Roethelisberger took a stand and matured as a team leader last week, taking the blame squarely on his shoulders and making no excuses for his poor play last season even though, as was revealed today, he actually spent the whole 2006 season locked up in an overzealous Cleveland Browns fan’s basement, replaced by an android.
FBI agents revealed today that the motorcycle accident that almost killed Ben Roethlisberger was actually staged by a Cleveland Browns terrorist group, known as "The BrownOut", in order to kidnap him and replace him with an android. When the android experienced teething problems, an “appendectomy” was staged to fix the bugs. This android was cleverly engineered to only play well enough to make him seem like a groggy Ben Roethlisberger, and adhered to its Prime Directive: Keep the Steelers Out of the Playoffs.

Despite being held captive for months (where he notes he was well treated) and, in retrospect, not even taking the field during the 2006 season, Ben Roethlisberger takes full blame for the poor play of his android:

"You know what? I might have still had the same year," if there had been no trauma [or kidnapping], Roethlisberger said. "Who knows? I'm not going to look back and say, wow, this is what caused this and this is what caused that. There's no need for that. It's a bad year. It's going to happen. That's just the way it goes."